Uncle Paul
Seth and I were getting ready to move out of our apartment and into the house we live in today. J was nearly 14 months old. Before our helpers arrived, Seth received the devastating call from his dad. Uncle Paul (Seth's dad's brother) was killed in a car accident along with his dog. I had only met Uncle Paul once in the summer of 2000. There was an unofficial Harrington reunion. I finally got to meet Seth's dad's side of the family. I had a blast with all of them. I hung out with Uncle Paul as we panned for gold in the creeks. We all camped out on a mountain side, no bathroom or showers. We sung and told stories around a campfire. I will never forget it. Most of those people I have not seen again.
Virginia
My Grandma had passed away when I was very little. I have very few memories of her. My grandpa then remarried to my best friend's grandma, Virginia. It was a dream come true: my best friend and I would be cousins. I never called Virginia "Grandma." It was always "Grandpa and Virginia." But, I did enjoy being in her family. My sisters and I would often ride our bike or rollerblade to their house and they would give us popsickles or push-ups for a snack. Grandpa passed away of a heart attack in 1999 while Seth and I were interning at a camp in New York. We flew to Iowa for the funeral. Virginia continued to be a part of our family. She made sweaters and pot holders and had an entire room in their house dedicated to her work. I got a phone call in May that she had suddenly passed away. I went to the school where Seth worked at the time to tell him. I don't remember if my sister, Lisa, was living here at the time or just visiting. But we made plans to head to Iowa for the funeral. It was Memorial Day weekend.
Baby Harrington
Earlier that spring, we found out we were expecting another baby. It wasn't planned and I wasn't sure if I was ready for another baby already. J wasn't even a year yet. Just before Virginia's funeral, I started having problems. I called my Dr. and he said it was ok to travel to Iowa for the funeral. My family knew of my situation and were praying for the baby. My older sister, Sara, announced that she was pregnant with their 1st baby that weekend. We talked about pregnancy stuff and I liked the idea of being pregnant together with her. My baby was due about a month before hers. However, things got much worse after we returned home in Kansas. We went to the ER and got a sonogram. The baby was gone. We took it easy that day. I don't remember a whole lot, but I think we went to a park and then to the mall where J rode the kid rides in the food court. Seth was heartbroken. I was just lost and feeling soooo guilty that I may have had something to do with losing the baby. At some point (on another day, not sure how much later), I was in excruciating pain. We went back to the ER. I received pain meds and the baby came out. They put the baby in a small casing so we could take it to Idaho and bury it. I was just 11 weeks along, but the baby was only 9 weeks in size. We could see the eyes, the stubs of arms and legs. It was truly fascinating to see an unborn baby up close and in person. But it was MY baby. And Seth's baby. And J's little brother or sister. I stayed over in the hospital delaying our planned trip to Idaho to see Seth's parents. First we stopped by Seth's older sister's house not too far from Wichita. I also remember stopping in Iowa before heading west, but I don't remember why. We showed my family the baby. Then we headed to Idaho. It was several days before we finally went to the cemetary to bury it. I was just in shock that I had a miscarriage. It was something that other women had, not me. Seth was so heartbroken to have lost his baby. I cried every night for months and carried the guilt for several years.
Uncle Eldon
While in Idaho, I got a call that my great uncle passed away suddenly. Sudden in that we didn't expect it but yet not a surprise because he was "at that age" so to speak and losing his mind. He and his wife never had children so they were like a third set of grandparents. We trick-or-treated at their house and sang "Happy Birthday" to Aunt Helen because her birthday was on Halloween. They came to our Christmases, too. His wife died in 1999 while we were in New York and I was unable to return to Iowa for her funeral because I was just there for my grandpa's. Eldon was my other grandpa's brother. Since we had not been in Idaho for very long, I chose to stay and miss Eldon's funeral. We knew that my grandpa was losing a battle to cancer.
Grandpa
I seemed to get daily updates on Grandpa Stowell while I was in Idaho. I don't remember how long he had cancer, but he was going downhill fast. Finally, on Father's Day, his battle ended. We left Idaho earlier than planned and made our way back to Kansas. We stopped in Wichita, took care of bills, did laundry, took naps, J took a nap at some very generous friends' house, repacked, and headed to Iowa the same day. Grandpa was an elder in our church. He enjoyed singing, and even got to sing with Dick Van Dyke. He played special games with us grandkids like "The Monster Game," and "I've got so and so" and "Little blackbird," and the handkerchief mouse. He always had his video camera out to capture special grandkid moments. I still miss him.
Uncle Bill (in the back on the left)
Seth and I had made plans to host a youth trip to Idaho with friends we knew at the camp in Iowa where we worked for a year. We had gone up to that camp right after Grandpa's funeral and worked for 2 weeks. J celebrated his first birthday while we were there. We returned to Kansas for a few weeks and then headed back out to Idaho for the youth group trip. We explored, and camped, and swam, and hiked. It was quite fun. Then my family, after struggling to get a hold of me, finally left a message with Seth's grandma who passed it along to Seth's dad. I was standing next to him as he relayed the message from his cell phone. My uncle Bill passed away suddenly. I could hardly take any more. He was my mom's sister's husband. My youngest cousin was only 14 (I think I did my calculations right). I think this hit my family the hardest that year. Christmas was already going to be hard without Grandpa, but now my cousins no longer had their dad. My aunt lost her dad and her husband within weeks. I cried on Seth's shoulder, wondering why God was allowing all of this, especially Bill. No one was ready to let him go. Since we were committed to doing a ministry at the time, we felt we had to finish with that and if it meant missing Bill's funeral, then so be it. The trip was almost over, however, so there was a possibility of making it back to Iowa in time. My sister, Lisa, was visiting her fiance in Wichita and she said she would wait for me to take me to Iowa for the funeral. I told her she didn't have to because we weren't going to rush home. And we didn't. We were exhausted from this Idaho trip since it was combined with a ministry which can really wipe a person out. We took 2 days instead of driving it in one shot. We arrived at our house late. Bill's funeral was the next morning. Lisa was sleeping on our couch. We got in a few hours of sleep, then Lisa and I (and possibly J, we can't remember for sure) headed to Iowa and arrived at the funeral home before the funeral started. We changed clothes and then stood in the foyer with the family, talking, and crying. I remember that even my grandma had a very difficult time at this one. Specific conversations and faces are forever imprinted in my memory and still bring me to tears.
Uncle Ernie (far left)
The night I heard that Bill had passed away, I crawled into our tent and told Seth there would be 2 more. This wasn't over. I was right. Uncle Ernie, another brother of Grandpa Stowell, passed away suddenly. He seemed healthy and this certainly caught us all by surprise. I did not make it back to Iowa this time. It was October, Seth was working at the school, and we had done enough traveling that year, especially for funerals. I don't remember a lot about him. He had his own family. He came to our church and I loved going up to him when I was a kid and say, "Hi, Ernie! Where's Burt?" My family was very weary of losing loved ones at this point. Going to funerals just seemed routine.
Uncle Gene (in the back, 3rd from the left)
Uncle Gene was my grandpa Cannon's brother. He had also been battling cancer and so it was no surprise when he lost his battle. His funeral was in Minnesota. I only saw him once every other year at the Cannon reunion. He was quiet and I always got him mixed up with the youngest brother, Don, who had passed away some years earlier. His wife, Gloria, is so spunky and fun. She remarried and brought her new family to our last reunion. The Cannon family may be huge, but we are close and we welcome all new members to the family with open arms.
2002 ended and we could all start a new year, new life, new perspective. When I felt like I was losing my grip and I clung to the Lord. He never let go of me. I don't remember the exact verse that I quoted to myself often throughout the year but it basically said, in everything be thankful. No matter what was going on in my family that year, I focused on being thankful. Thanking the Lord that most of us know Him as Savior and we would see some of our loved ones again (if not all). Thanking the Lord that my immediate family, my husband, and my son, all survived the year. Thanking the Lord for the new life that God was creating inside of me - daughter K would be born the next summer. Thanking the Lord that my sister's pregnancy was going well and my sister-in-law's pregnancy was also going well. Thanking the Lord that in the midst of sadness, we were able to gather in the joyous occasion of a close friend's wedding. It was a very trying year and we still don't understand why we lost so many. But we trust in God's perfect plan and timing.
Thank You, Lord, for holding my family close 10 years ago, and for bringing us all closer to You.
"In everything give thanks; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." 1 Thessalonians 5:18
"Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials." James 1:2
"Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort." 2 Corinthians 1:3
